this is a little premature, but i'm already thinking about the new year and what new things i want to try in 2005. it's a short list so far, but i think i have a good start. so, here it is: try yoga, take guitar lessons, learn to speak spanish, visit alaska. i would be happy if i did just one of those things. any suggestions?

today i drove over to jbu to hang out with mandii. we had lunch at a local mexican restaurant and then went back to her dorm to play guitar together. well, actually i just hold my guitar and sit in awe of mandii and her mad skills on the guitar. she is very nice about my lack of skills (i only have one strum and a limited number of chords i can play) and always graciously humors me. anyway, she is incredible. i did get to play one song for her. it is a 90s (or maybe late 80s) classic that we've talked for months about playing. i finally found the chords and i've been working on it for about a week. you guessed it- "straight up" by paula abdul. there's nothing like acoustic paula abdul songs. anyway, it was great fun and a wonderful afternoon.

on tuesday i'm flying to alabama for the thanksgiving holiday and i'm so excited! a family here at garnett gave me an american airlines voucher they had, so i 'm getting to fly for $15. that is amazing! thanks garrens! after thanksgiving, i'm heading up to nashville for a few days to stay with megan and jason thompson and to see some good friends. it should be a great time. peace.

i am a HUGE u2 fan. their new album releases on monday and i can't wait. and i don't have to! on u2's website you can listen to the whole album in exchange for signing up for u2's mailing list. that is a pretty good deal. most of you have probably heard "vertigo" already, which completely rocks. i'm on the third song on the album now and so far, it sounds great. check it out! peace.

i have had a good weekend. some of the highlights were:

• going to a movie with my friend lisa
• playing the sweet jurassic park video game with lindsey and cory (and i'm not even in to video games)
• getting to do my laundry at the voss' instead of the laundromat (thanks brad & shannon!)
• auburn demolishing georgia (we so should be #2!)
• concert of prayer at garnett
• a couple of good naps

tonight at garnett we had a chili cook-off/operation christmas child packing party/concert of prayer. it wasn't anything extravagant, but it was good. i love it when we have "fellowships." There is something earthy and basic and right about just getting together to eat.

it was also great to see all the boxes and gifts and wrapping paper that will be sent to children all over the world. i think i heard that garnett is sending about 300 boxes. there is something right about this, too. i got a sense that these are the kinds of things we should be getting together about and spending our time and energy and money on. for me there was something holy about the stack of boxes sitting out in our foyer.

the concert of prayer took me by surprise. i'm not sure why - it wasn't that any of the prayer stations made me think of anything new or were super deep. we prayed for the leaders in our church (it was extremely humbling to think of prayers being offered for me), for places where there is conflict in the world, that the word of God would go to places all over the world and bless the people there, and for our community and the hurts and heartaches present here. those are all very important things to pray for and those who put it together did a great job. i guess what took me by surprise was the sacred feeling of the room, the space and the time. i'm not sure what made it feel that way. it may have been the low-lighting and the soft worship music playing. it might have been the sight of families huddling together and praying over this stuff. it might have been how quiet it was. or maybe it was just the fact that it was a space and time set aside to talk to and petition God. i don't know what it was, but the space and the time just seemed sacred.

i didn't really want to leave, even when i had finished all the stations. something in me wanted to just stay and sit in the holiness - soak it up. i think that is probably an idicator of what's missing right now in my life. it is an inicator of what i'm thirsty and hungry for. this transition and new position has taken a toll on the time i spend being quiet and still and meditating on God. that has probably been more draining than my pace or events or the pressure i feel. in a way it is good because it is my spirit and soul and heart crying out for God - a beautiful thing. it is unfortunate in another way because it is as if i've been starving myself from the thing i need most to sustain me during this time.

i read the book, the life of pi, last year and right now i'm listening to it on cd. it is one of my new favorites i think. it is about a boy, piscene, who, through many events (i don't want to ruin the story - you should really read this book) finds himself in a lifeboat with a bengal tiger. it has me thinking about hunger and thirst and what that drives a person to do. for piscene, a vegetarian and one who views all life as sacred, he became a killer (as he describes himself) and slaughters turtles and fish and even drinks their blood in an attempt to survive and to quench his extreme hunger and thirst. i know a comparison here is kind of a stretch, but i'm wondering what i will do with my spiritual hunger and thirst. will the pursuit for what i'm hungry for drive me to change even the most basic parts of who i am? am i that hungry or is it that kind of hungry that if you just ignore it a little while, it will go away? i hope it is the first kind although, just like with piscene, that kind of hungry and thirsty can be pretty messy. i think i'm ok with messy. peace.